Blonde jokes
You are now in the Blonde jokes category. Currently, you will find 599 jokes on the subject of Blonde jokes, which we are constantly expanding for you.
Three men are all working on building a house. They go up to the roof for lunch, and unwrapped their sandwiches. The Brunette says "if I get one more Tuna sandwich, I'm going to jump off this roof and kill myself. The black haired one says "if I get one more pickle and lettuce sandwich, I, too, am going to jump off this roof and kill myself. The blonde looks at his sandwich and also declares, "if I get one more peanut butter and jelly sandwich, I'm going to jump off this roof and kill myself." The next day, they all get the same sandwiches and kill themselves. That night, their wives all meet up and mourn. "If I had known that my husband was going to kill himself over a sandwich, I wouldn't have given it to him." The brunette cries. "Same," the raven head replies. They both look at the blonde. "Don't look at me, he packed his own lunch!"
Do you know what a blonde does when she has her ear on the rail?
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She's listening to metal.
What about when she's got her ear on the rail and there's a train coming?
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He's listening to death metal.
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She's listening to metal.
What about when she's got her ear on the rail and there's a train coming?
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He's listening to death metal.
Why did the blonde snort Sweet'N Low? She thought it was Diet Coke!
Why do blondes leave cheese on the computer?
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To eat the mouse.
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To eat the mouse.
Why is the blonde putting the newspaper in the fridge?
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To keep it fresh.
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To keep it fresh.
There are two blondes working in a park in the middle of the city. One always digs a hole and the other, who follows her, fills it with dirt. They work like this all day long without resting, one digging holes, the other filling them in.
One passer-by doesn't give a damn and after a while asks them:
"I appreciate your diligence, ladies, but would you be so kind as to explain to me the purpose of your work? You dig the hole and your colleagues cover it with dirt."
The first one stops, wipes the sweat from her brow and says: "You know, normally we work in threes, but the colleague who puts the trees in the holes is sick today."
One passer-by doesn't give a damn and after a while asks them:
"I appreciate your diligence, ladies, but would you be so kind as to explain to me the purpose of your work? You dig the hole and your colleagues cover it with dirt."
The first one stops, wipes the sweat from her brow and says: "You know, normally we work in threes, but the colleague who puts the trees in the holes is sick today."
Three women (a blonde, a redhead, and a brunette) are lost in the forest while hunting. They each have a shotgun with 2 bullets. They make a fire. Then the redhead gets up and goes hunting. She comes back with 2 rabbits. The other two say, "Wow, where did you get that?" She says, "I found tracks. I followed tracks. I saw rabbits. Rabbits ran. I shot. Rabbits stopped." Then the brunette leaves and comes back with a deer. The other two say, "Wow, Where did you get that?" She says, "I found tracks. I followed tracks. I saw deer. Deer ran. I shot. Deer stopped." The blonde leaves and comes crawling back, all bloodied and black and blue. They others say, "Wow, where did you get that?" She says, "I found tracks. I followed tracks. I saw train. Train ran. I shot. Train didn't stop."
A blonde girl walks down the street, sees a banana peel in front of her and says, "Oh, God, I'm going to slip again..."
Blonde at the driving test.
"What would you do if your bike fell off while you were driving?"
"I'd speed up and catch up!"
"What would you do if your bike fell off while you were driving?"
"I'd speed up and catch up!"
Do you know what chronic speech disorder blondes have?
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They can't say "No."
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They can't say "No."
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