Jokes, quotes, games - Page 5

A Jewish father was very troubled by the way his son turned out and went to see his rabbi about it.

"Rabbi, I brought him up in the faith, gave him a very expensive Bar Mitzvah and it cost me a fortune to educate him. Then he tells me last week, he's decided to be a Christian. Rabbi, where did I go wrong?"

The rabbi strokes his beard and says, "Funny you should come to me. I too, brought up my son as a boy of faith, sent him to university and it cost me a fortune and then one day he comes to me and tells me he wants to be a Christian."

"What did you do?" asked the man of the rabbi.

"I turned to God for the answer," replied the rabbi.

"What did he say?" asked the man.

He said, "Funny you should come to me..."

Doctor to patient: "Why are you nervous?"
Patient: "Because this is the first item I am going to have An operation."
Doctor: "But I am not nervous though this is going to be my first operation."

My aunt died, God bless her, at a ripe old age of 104.
We called her Aunt Tique.

Girlfriend: "I dreamed I saw you in a jewelry store and you were buying me a diamond ring.”

Boyfriend: "I had the same dream, and I saw your dad paying the bill.”

Take one out and scratch my head, I am now black but once was red. What am I?

A match.

Yo mama so stupid, she tried to save a fish from drowning.

Who may open the door without using hands, nor legs? An invalid.

What do you call a horse who’s a world traveler? A globe-trotter.

Knock, knock! Who’s there? Dexter. Dexter who? Dexter halls with boughs of holly…

Mexican literature has amazing novels like How Tequila Mockingbird