Q: Why did the cannibal tax auditor get disciplined?
A: For buttering up her clients.
Black Humor
Black humor, also known as dark humor or gallows humor, is a form of comedy or satire that makes light of serious or taboo subjects, such as death, violence, disease, and tragedy. It often involves using irony, sarcasm, or satire to point out the absurdity or incongruity of these topics, often making light of the tragic or taboo aspects of them.
A guy has a bad habit:
He loves to hit pedestrians while he drives.
So one day he's driving andsees an old lady with a cane and he decides to control his urge to swerve and hit her but he can't.
Later, he sees a kid skating and can't resist hitting the kid.
Finally, he decides he needs help from above so he goes to a church and asks the pastor for help.
So after church, the pastor invites him to his house for lunch.
They get in the car and start to drive down the street, and just as he starts to tell the pastor about his problem, he sees an old blind man walking down the street.
He swerves toward him but misses, and the pastor says, "Don't worry. I got him with the door!"
He loves to hit pedestrians while he drives.
So one day he's driving andsees an old lady with a cane and he decides to control his urge to swerve and hit her but he can't.
Later, he sees a kid skating and can't resist hitting the kid.
Finally, he decides he needs help from above so he goes to a church and asks the pastor for help.
So after church, the pastor invites him to his house for lunch.
They get in the car and start to drive down the street, and just as he starts to tell the pastor about his problem, he sees an old blind man walking down the street.
He swerves toward him but misses, and the pastor says, "Don't worry. I got him with the door!"
Q: Why does Dr. Pepper come in bottles?
A: Because his wife died.
A: Because his wife died.
Q: What's faster than the speed of light?
A: A jew passing Germany.
A: A jew passing Germany.
Peter called his doctor’s office for an appointment.
"I’m sorry," said the receptionist, "we can’t fit you in for at least two weeks."
"But I could be dead by then!"
"No problem. If your wife lets us know, we’ll cancel the appointment."
"I’m sorry," said the receptionist, "we can’t fit you in for at least two weeks."
"But I could be dead by then!"
"No problem. If your wife lets us know, we’ll cancel the appointment."
Woman patient: "Doctor I was suffering so much that I wanted to die."
Doctor: "You did the right thing to call me."
Doctor: "You did the right thing to call me."
Strong people don't put other people down.
They lift them up and slam them to the ground for maximum impact.
They lift them up and slam them to the ground for maximum impact.
Q: What is the worst thing an emergency doctor can tell you after admitting your MIL?
A: Sir, we were able to save her!
A: Sir, we were able to save her!
I was a little taken aback when I got my receipt from the funeral parlor, on the bottom of the receipt, after the bill, it read, "Thank you. Please come again."
How do you make a baby drink?
Stick it in the blender.
Stick it in the blender.
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